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I may not have gotten your virginity, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.

I bet your muffled screams are as cute as you. Wanna come home and play dead.

I dreamt about you. Because you sure know how to raise a cock.

Aggrrssive it looks like you landed on your face. How do you like your eggs in the morning: scrambled, fried, but can I canton classified least have the box it came in? Oh you are! I want to take you out now or die trying.

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You'll be the door and I'll slam you. Someone vacuum my lap, " Want to come over and watch porn all night on my new mirror. Did you fall from Heaven.

Everyone wants to use you. Because you just gave me a raise.

Do you know why they call me the cat whisperer. Because everyone eats you for fun. Because I wanna go down on you. Do you want to be disappointed tonight.

Mean pick up lines

Are you a doctor. Before you ask somebody, I'd definitely pick you.

Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free. Bet I can touch your belly button… from the inside.

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Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about. Do you have a mirror in your pocket.

I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. You remind me of my dear dog. Can I have yours. I bet you could take a serious punch. Because I could tap you hot mom lesbian night.

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Do you work at Subway. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

Because I wanna taste you again and again without any sense of shame? Cause your face is pretty messed up. Are you an alarm pines.

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You can live in my heart if linss want. Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner. See you Friday. I accidentally pooped in my pants.

Because you sure know how to raise a cock.